"What wonderful sons you have"

Hardly a day goes by without someone telling us 'what wonderful... sweet... polite... kind....generous.....thoughtful.....and on and on and on...boys we have.

It makes me feel so proud of my young men, that they are growing into such unique, popular and welcome individuals. It's also pretty neat to think that we've had some small part in them turning out so amazingly well. The only thing we've done is love them and guide them in their own 'growing-up' journeys.
It's not always been easy, in fact it's sometimes...no actually..often times, it has been challenging. But the rewards of seeing our children grow up and get compliments from strangers almost every day, is quite exciting.

I think my favorite thing to see is how gentle, caring, considerate and generous they are with young children, especially their sister. They often put their own needs and desires below hers and are always there to help her, read to her, play and just listen to anything she wants to tell them.
Even when we are out and about without Jenna, Jackson or Jeremiah will notice something, and say, "Jenna would love this!", or "It doesn't feel the same without Jenna here. I miss her".

And of course, whenever Jenna's big brothers are not around, she is quick to say, "I miss my brothers". I love how close they are and how they are always watching out for each other.

Jackson & Jeremiah are also very willing to help around the house and do chores, such as emptying the dishwasher and dryer, putting away clothes, feeding the animals, taking out the trash, cleaning up the house, assisting with the cooking, even shopping for groceries.

It's always been important to me that my children grow up responsible and self-reliant. Participating in the daily running of our family is a wonderful way to practice and learn those much needed skills. I've had friends who didn't know how to boil water, wash their own clothes, pack a lunch, or clean a bathroom because their parents or housekeepers did it all for them.
My own husband can't even cook a meal because his grandmother always insisted on doing it for him. He went off to college and just about starved and went broke always eating take-out food. He didn't even know how to fold his own clothes. My sons already know how to do most of those things that he still doesn't know, and that some children, their age, don't know or may never know.

Some parents believe they are doing their children favors by always doing for their children, and they believe that one day their children can learn important life skills whenever they are ready...but I cannot live behind rose-colored-glasses, because I know how cruel life can be. My Mother died when I was 8 years old and I was glad to have been taught important life skills to help me survive. I know how vital it is to prepare my own children for their future. It sneaks up too fast.

Also, I'm not sure, if due to our financial hardships and struggles, that our sons have become more aware of other people's struggles, or that they are just so generous and caring on their own.
But they are, even when I forget. When we go to any store, and there is a "Food for the Hungry" jar set up, Jeremiah always asks for any spare change, or takes it out of his own pocket to donate.

When there have been times, that we didn't have enough money for food, and one of the boys had a little bit of change, they'd offer it to help buy the food, which we rarely ever accepted.

When our neighbor brings over treats or food for us, they always insist on going over to her house to hug and thank her.

They have been the recipients of food from the local food pantry and our church, and they have received Christmas gifts from charity....and they have wept, along with us in deep and humble thankfulness.

Of course, no parent ever wants to have their child struggle or need for anything. It causes deep aches inside a parent to watch their child deal with the sadness and frustrations of poverty. But going through such experiences also opens up a person's eyes to the rest of the world.....the majority of the world, who struggle even more than we do just to survive each day.
The experience of poverty helps make us aware, and to appreciate the small things that most people take for granted each day.
It also makes us want to be generous, and to care about other people...and to help make a difference.

It seems, from the discussions that our sons and we have each week, that this is the direction we are going in....striving to make a difference. We believe that is why God has led us in this dark valley, and will ultimately lead us out into the light again.

We were all put on this planet for a reason. It's important to discover that reason and make a positive, selfless and meaningful difference.